Saturday, April 9, 2011

Fail.

I am sad. Very sad. I cannot move properly, I cannot take my children to the park, I cannot even play in the backyard with them without another adult present to help when they run off. I feel incompetent. I feel lost and lonely and basically sorry for myself. I tried to go to a church function today but all it did was remind me of all the things I cannot do and how much of an epic failure I am right now. And now, I wonder what is holding me back more, my knee or my depression. I hate this. More than anything in the world. I hate this new challenge that has been put before me. I hate all the goals it has squashed and I hate how it has put my life on hold.

3 comments:

Amy said...

This is NOT your failure. You are NOT a failure. Have you thought about seeking more help for your depression? I can't even imagine what you must be going through but this is NOT your doing. You are going to make it through this. You are a strong woman and nothing is going to stand in your way.

~Lisa Renee~ said...

Thanks Amy :) Yea, I am making an appointment with my Dr on Monday. She usually gets me in pretty quick. I just hate taking pills and hate admitting I am not strong enough to handle it on my own. Just heal already!!! lol. As silly as it sounds I am also tired of being a crybaby haha.

ashley @ divorced at 20 said...

Being able to admit you need help is FREAKING STRONG! you can do it!